You might think about making amends and reuniting your houses at some point following your divorce. Making the decision to get back together is crucial and will impact you and your kids for the rest of your lives. Consider these questions to help you determine if this is the best decision for you:
Do you still love them in spite of all the anguish and pain?
Are you prepared to put some effort into a fresh start?
Are you prepared to analyze your communication style and make the necessary changes to stop utilizing harmful communication methods?
Are you ready to forgive and let go of your grudges?
Are you ready to put a lot of effort into problem-solving and prioritize your relationship?
What aspects of your relationship still work well? Do the positives exceed the negatives?
Do you have the support of others to make the relationship work?
Are you willing to seek couples counseling, if necessary?
What about your children?
Children often wish their parents would get together again. They want both parents under one roof, but they also want peace and harmony in their home so they can go about the business of being a child and growing up.
Consistency is essential to your children’s well-being. The acts of separating, coming back together, and separating yet again carry an enormous price for children. If you are considering reconciliation, it’s better for your children to keep your households separate while you and your former partner work out your issues.
Living together again
To help you decide to reconcile and live together again, consider the following:
The breakdown of the relationship so you both know what went wrong and can avoid these mistakes in the future.
The changes you and the other parent need to make in behaviors and communication styles
The need for forgiveness on both sides.
How strongly you believe reconciliation will work and are committed to making it work.
Consult a professional couple’s counselor before you start living together again and afterward, as needed.